Our Marriage

Craig: If we wrote our ketubah in Klingon, do you think anyone would notice?


Me: Depends who was reading it.


Craig: You're right.  Some of our friends speak Klingon.

Shut Up Kids

As we walk through our apartment complex, some of the kids are being extra noisy.  I have a bad migraine.

Craig (to a seven year old boy): Hey, how do you say, "Shut up, I have a headache," in Spanish?

Boy: ¡Cállate!

Cunning Plan

Craig: I have this problem after watching Black Adder (a T.V. show) that I say cunning plan every time I mean I have an idea.  And it's getting worse.

Me: Honey, I love it when you have a cunning plan.

Ambien Cooking

At the end of the day, we look at the crock pot concoction I had started the night before.

Craig: Honey, what's in this?

Me: I don't really remember.  Some juice, chicken, bbq sauce, onions, potatoes, lemon juice... and I forget.

Craig: No more cooking on ambien.

We had take out that night.